Movie Review ~ Master Gardener

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The Facts:

Synopsis: Narvel Roth is the meticulous horticulturist of Gracewood Gardens, a beautiful estate owned by wealthy dowager Mrs. Haverhill. When she orders Roth to take on her troubled great-niece Maya as his apprentice, his life is thrown into chaos, and dark secrets from his past emerge.
Stars: Joel Edgerton, Sigourney Weaver, Quintessa Swindell, Esai Morales, Victoria Hill, Eduardo Losan, Rick Cosnett, Amy Le, Erika Ashley, Jared Bankens, Cade Burk, DJames Jones, Matt Mercurio
Director: Paul Schrader
Rated: R
Running Length: 107 minutes
TMMM Score: (2/10)
Review: In his sixth decade working in motion pictures, writer/director Paul Schrader has seen his ups and downs in the movie business. From the early high of a one-two punch in 1976 of Taxi Driver and Obsession to the struggles in the early ‘90s to regain his voice, Schrader regained some traction in 2017, landing his only Oscar nomination with First Reformed. He followed that in 2021 with the well-received The Card Counter and has completed the triumvirate of stony-faced men giving major side eye in the posters with Master Gardener

To say that Schrader’s latest finds him in the weeds is both a cheap pun and a thorny bouquet way of stating that this drama fertilized with thriller elements is a withered mess. Dry and brittle, it features the director pandering to his worst, most self-indulgent instincts and bringing down a good cast with him. It’s the type of film where a supposedly respectable, eloquent woman utters the phrase ‘tit cancer’ in the same breath she waxes poetic about an old black lab she’s named ‘Porch Dog’ because, you know, he sits on the porch. I’m getting a bit ahead of myself, however…

The opening of Master Gardener suggests that Schrader is back to his First Reformed ways of internalizing the emotional arc of a troubled soul and inviting the audience to watch how repressed feelings seep out in small doses over two hours. Sadly, that blasted ‘tit cancer’/ ‘Porch Dog’ scene happens (lines only Schrader would dare to write), and the illusion is broken almost as soon as it has begun. By that time, we’ve established Joel Edgerton (Boy Erased) as Narvel Roth, an enigmatic horticulturist employed on the estate of Norma, a mannered woman (Sigourney Weaver, The Good House) who has invited Roth into her gardens and, as we find out awkwardly, her bed.

Roth lives on the massive acreage, all the better to stay close to the plants, and keeps detailed journals about the precise interaction between flora and fauna – some that will parallel the twisty entanglements to come. Norma asks Narvel to take on her orphaned grand-niece Maya (Quintessa Swindell, Black Adam) as a new apprentice, teaching the inexperienced teen how to make the garden grow. It isn’t long before the teacher becomes more than a little interested in the student, first taking on the role of protector from an abusive boyfriend, then an interventionist, and ultimately (cringe!) her savior.

The relationship between Narvel and Maya (as played by Edgerton and Swindell) is painfully chemistry-free, so when the script thrusts them together as lovers (not precisely a spoiler because you can see it coming a mile away) and tells you they have found a weird sort of affection you can’t fully accept it. Narvel is clearly the two decades older the actor Edgerton is over Swindell, and throw in some issues Narvel has with his absent teen daughter, and you have something gross to sort out on your own time. That’s the only fast-moving plot point in Schrader’s meandering film, which takes longer to get through than a stroll through an actual botanical garden.

Huge plot problems aside, the acting is disappointing too. Edgerton was on a roll with parts that allowed the Australian actor to push past the typical Hollywood leading action star mold and expand into something different. You can see where the appeal was to work with Schrader on a character with Narvel’s complexities (I’m deliberately leaving out a significant character detail that informs much of his actions). Still, it doesn’t fully come through in the execution. As a wealthy shrew who uses her money to control others, Weaver fares better because she’s adept at circumnavigating parts for women who tend to dismiss them outright. However, even she can’t acquit Norma from some very odd dialogue that sometimes makes her sound like she’s in 1920s Maryland and others as if she’s slumming it in 1997 Hoboken. 

Schrader gets fed up with the Hollywood machine every few years, throws his hands up, and goes silent. Perhaps it’s time to take a breather again and sort out some of the problematic elements of Master Gardener that take it so awry. The icky romance (for real, so gross), the non-starter thriller aspects, and the dull flashback drama told in pieces that never come together to form a complete picture. It’s nothing shocking considering that Schrader has gone back to this older man/younger woman concept now dozens of times. Still, it is staggering that the director keeps writing the same film over and over again but can’t ever validate it as a worthwhile idea. This comes across as a first draft that no story editor got to before filming began. Skip it and go plant a tree instead.

31 Days to Scare ~ Hell Fest (2018)

The Facts:

Synopsis: A masked serial killer turns a horror themed amusement park into his own personal playground, terrorizing a group of friends while the rest of the patrons believe that it is all part of the show.

Stars: Amy Forsyth, Reign Edwards, Bex Taylor-Klaus, Christian James, Matt Mercurio, Tony Todd

Director: Gregory Plotkin

Rated: R

Running Length: 89 minutes

TMMM Score: (6/10)

Review:  I’ve always been a fan of haunted houses and a few years back I had the chance to step behind the scenes and be a part of one of them in my hometown.  As much fun as it is going through a creepy maze or demented house of horror I have to say that when you’re the one doing the scaring the enjoyment factor is raised several notches.  On the flip side, it makes it hard to go back to the other side of the scare which is why movies like the otherwise respectable Hell Fest don’t have quite the same impact on me now.

Though it possesses little in the way of actual scares, director Gregory Plotkin (Paranormal Activity: The Ghost Dimension) has crafted a good-looking movie that hums along nicely for it’s brief running time.  Plotkin has assembled a cabal of fresh-faced actors that do fine with the material and even at times elevate it from the paint-by-numbers schlock it most certainly is.  That’s not to say the script from Seth M. Sherwood and Blair Butler is total hogwash because there’s an interesting concept here: killer blends in among the revelers at Hell Fest, eventually targeting a woman and her friends as they work through mazes and rides that take them deeper into frightening territory.

Arriving in town just in time to accompany her friends to Hell Fest, Natalie (Amy Forsyth) isn’t much for scares but is interested in seeing potential love interest Gavin (Roby Attal) who has secured VIP passes for everyone.  Best friend Brooke (Reign Edwards) and smart-acre Taylor (Bex Taylor-Klaus) have their own boyfriends in tow so it becomes a triple date that’s quickly interrupted by a masked killer that starts to pick people off one-by-one as the night progresses.  Instead of heeding her own gut instincts, Natalie writes off her fears she’s being stalked as just a part of the price of admission in being scared but realizes too late she’s right on the money in feeling like her neck is on the line.

A few things don’t quite pan out here.  We’re told Hell Fest is so popular the entire run of dates has sold out yet nothing ever seems too busy.  Anyone that has ever been to an even marginally popular haunted attraction knows you are almost always packed shoulder to shoulder with other guests; that Natalie and her friends seem to have plenty of room to move about (and hang out in) these spaces is far-fetched.  Also, everyone seems to brush off the impending threat of death without much fanfare.  I know it’s a “busy” night and scares are the name of the game but is no one actually working at these places were bodies are left and discovering the gooey remains?

Those quibbles aside, this is a strange R-rated feature that doesn’t go all the way with its rating.  The kills are relatively tame and a few characters are disappointingly dispatched without much of a send-off.  With the size of the cast you would think that the writers and director could have come up with more showcases of gory offings just to please those looking for something a step up from a PG-13 rating.  Only a death by mallet and a guillotine sequence manage to stir some creative juices but they aren’t enough to help separate Hell Fest from other low-impact horror flicks available.  For reference, seek out The Funhouse from 1981 instead, it isn’t great either but that one at least makes good on some smart kills.

Even so, I’m giving this one a partial recommendation on the basis that it’s more than decent in production quality with respectable performances.  Also, I for one liked seeing the different attractions the gang screams their way through.  I can only imagine what those VIP tickets cost to the fictional Hell Fest of the movie but gaining entrance to Hell Fest at your local theater is worth a $5 matinee admission.