The Art of the Tease(rs) ~ Child’s Play 2 (1990)

Occasionally, I’ll revive one of my old “special” columns from my early days. Formerly titled In Praise of Teasers, I’ve rebranded my look at coming attractions The Art of the Tease(rs) and brought it back for a short run over the next few weeks. 

Starting in 2013, I used these peeks at past previews to highlight the fun (and short!) creatively mounted campaigns that generated buzz from audiences who caught them in front of movies back in the day. Some of these I remember seeing myself, and some I never had the pleasure of watching. More than anything, it makes me long for studios and advertising agencies to go back to showing less in modern trailers because the amount of spoiler-heavy material shared now is ghastly. Today, where all aspects of a movie are pretty well known before an inch of footage is seen, the subtlety of a well-crafted “teaser” trailer is gone.

Let’s revisit some of the teaser trailers I fondly remember and, in a way, reintroduce them. Whether the actual movie was good or bad is neither here nor there but pay attention to how each of these teasers works uniquely to grab the attention of movie-goers.

Child’s Play 2 (1990)

Ask around about this teaser trailer for Child’s Play 2, and you’ll hear several horror fans easily able to tell you where they were when they first saw it (in theaters before Problem Child?). It’s short, sweet, and memorable. I’d also wager a bet and say that for many, like me, this was the first of the Chucky films longtime franchise fans saw, not the snazzy 1988 original. Not knocking the dependable 1988 Tom Holland-directed introduction to the cute doll possessed by the soul of a serial killer that launched a successful inventory of films plus a recent TV series, but John Lafia’s follow-up is often highlighted as a more colorful and fun outing. They’re just two different apples off the same twisted tree. I like the taste of both, but sometimes I prefer the sour tang of Child’s Play 2 more than the crispness of the one that started it all. Plus…can you deny how fantastic the ending of this one is?

Universal Studios (which bought the rights to the franchise from United Artists in 1990) did good with this nifty teaser, developing not one but two taglines. “It’s Playtime…Again.” and the infamous “Sorry Jack, Chucky’s Back” are indeed for the industry history books. A full trailer would follow later, but it’s not nearly as effective as this brief warning to anyone resting easy, thinking they were safe from another recess with our favorite Good Guy.

For more teasers, check out my posts on Batman, The Golden Child, Exorcist II: The Heretic, Flashdance, Mortal Kombat, Strange Days, Fire in the Sky, The Fifth Element, The Addams Family, Alien, Misery, Bram Stoker’s Dracula, Showgirls, Jurassic Park, Jaws 3D/Jaws: The Revenge, Total Recall, Halloween II: Season of the Witch, Psycho (1998), The Game, In the Line of Fire

The Art of the Tease(rs) ~ The Golden Child (1986)

Occasionally, I’ll revive one of my old “special” columns from my early days. Formerly titled In Praise of Teasers, I’ve rebranded my look at coming attractions The Art of the Tease(rs) and brought it back for a short run over the next few weeks. 

Starting in 2013, I used these peeks at past previews to highlight the fun (and short!) creatively mounted campaigns that generated buzz from audiences who caught them in front of movies back in the day. Some of these I remember seeing myself, and some I never had the pleasure of watching. More than anything, it makes me long for studios and advertising agencies to go back to showing less in modern trailers because the amount of spoiler-heavy material shared now is ghastly. Today, where all aspects of a movie are pretty well known before an inch of footage is seen, the subtlety of a well-crafted “teaser” trailer is gone.

Let’s revisit some of the teaser trailers I fondly remember and, in a way, reintroduce them. Whether the actual movie was good or bad is neither here nor there but pay attention to how each of these teasers works uniquely to grab the attention of movie-goers.

The Golden Child (1986)

Looking for a movie to watch one night recently, I suggested The Golden Child because it had been some time since I had seen this 1986 Eddie Murphy action comedy. I remembered it being a minor speed bump in Murphy’s hot streak between the first two Beverly Hills Cop films but forgot how abysmal a slog it was. While not an outright bomb because of its Christmas release and audience devotion to what Murphy was selling back then, its reputation as a disaster has followed it like a curse, and very rightfully so. For an action movie, its pace is deadly, and as a comedy, it only comes alive when Murphy is let loose to work his magic. That the comedy frequently has little to do with the plot only shows you how disinterested everyone involved was with the finished product, something that makes sense when you hear how the film was massively changed during post-production. Originally intended as a more serious new direction for Murphy, poor test screenings scared studio execs into reshoots that scrapped a supposedly intelligent plot in favor of the incoherent mess it winds up as. It’s also got one of the worst scores ever, quickly composed dreck that replaced a more classical theme from John Barry.

On the flip side, the teaser trailer for The Golden Child, a rare find on YouTube, is exceptional. Filmed exclusively for this coming attraction, it uses a voiceover to lay out the plot and tacks on Murphy at the end to goose the audience with laughs. It’s no wonder they turned out in droves to see it. How disappointing that The Golden Child would be so leaden.

For more teasers, check out my posts on Exorcist II: The Heretic, Flashdance, Mortal Kombat, Strange Days, Fire in the Sky, The Fifth Element, The Addams Family, Alien, Misery, Bram Stoker’s Dracula, Showgirls, Jurassic Park, Jaws 3D/Jaws: The Revenge, Total Recall, Halloween II: Season of the Witch, Psycho (1998), The Game, In the Line of Fire

The Silver Bullet ~ Peanuts

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Synopsis: For the first time ever, Snoopy, Charlie Brown and the rest of the gang we know and love from Charles Schulz’s timeless Peanuts comic strip will be making their big-screen debut; like they’ve never been seen before in a CG-animated feature film in 3D.

Release Date:   November 6, 2015

Thoughts: Admittedly, I have a very soft spot in my heart for the simple hand-drawn animation that gave the early Peanuts films and TV specials such heart.  And it’s a bit of a shock that it took so long for a studio to capitalize on the lasting impression the characters in Charles Schulz’s imagination have left on the public.  Though the film isn’t due for release until late in 2015 and plot details are unknown, a teaser morsel has been released (which we’ll probably see before every animated film for the next 22 months) and while it may be a little too brightly fancy free, I’m looking forward to seeing the gang in a new film.  After all, it’s been 34 years since Charlie Brown, Snoopy, Peppermint Patty, Sally, Lucy, Linus, and the rest have had a film in theaters.  It’s time.

The Silver Bullet ~ Guardians of the Galaxy

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Synopsis: In the far reaches of space, an American pilot named Peter Quill finds himself the object of a manhunt after stealing an orb coveted by the villainous Ronan.

Release Date:  August 1, 2014

Thoughts: I should start out by saying that I’m totally familiar with the Guardians of the Galaxy comic and all of the characters introduced within.  Teased first at the end of Thor: The Dark World, the full trailer for Marvel’s latest “Hail, Hail, the Gang’s All Here” film has an awful lot of impressive looking images that we’ve come to expect from an effects driven superhero film.  What I find it’s lacking, however, is some justification for being so tonally blasé.  It’s seems preciously desperate to come across with the same structured sarcasm as Marvel’s The Avengers even though that blockbuster already earned its stripes by bringing characters together already established in solo films.  With a meaty cast like Chris Pratt (Her), Zoe Saldana (Out of the Furnace), Lee Pace (The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug), Glenn Close (Albert Nobbs), Bradley Cooper (American Hustle), and Vin Diesel (Riddick) on board the film isn’t lacking in star power…I just hope it’s not nearly as comic-booky as it looks.

The Silver Bullet ~ Tammy

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Synopsis: After losing her job and learning that her husband has been unfaithful, a woman hits the road with her profane, hard-drinking grandmother.

Release Date:  July 2, 2014

Thoughts: Ok…let me just say something that no one seems really willing to say: Melissa McCarthy has not delivered on the promise put forth in her rightfully praised breakthrough (and Oscar nominated) performance in Bridesmaids.  She just hasn’t.  She hasn’t.  You can disagree all you want but having watched McCarthy rehash the same character in films like Identity Thief, This is 40, The Hangover Part III, and The Heat not to mention her last severely awful hosting gig at Saturday Night Live I’m just not on her bandwagon anymore.  Like The Heat, this first trailer for Tammy has zero laughs, finding McCarthy pulling the same shtick we’ve seen her do countless times.  That’s depressing considering the impressive roster of actors involved with the movie like Susan Sarandon (Jeff, Who Lives at Home), Dan Aykroyd (This is My Life), Kathy Bates (Titanic: 3D), and Allison Janney (The Way Way Back).  I’m actually dreading this movie.

The Silver Bullet ~ Enemy

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Synopsis: A man seeks out his exact look-alike after spotting him in a movie.

Release Date:  March 14, 2014

Thoughts: It was on the set of Enemy that star Jake Gyllenhaal and director Denis Villeneuve discussed the A-list actor coming on board Villeneuve’s next project: 2013’s highly effective (and high up on my best of the year list) Prisoners.  So even though it was completed first, Enemy is just getting ready for a release in early March.  A much smaller film that the Hollywood studio-backed Prisoners, Enemy suggests another moody puzzle of a film the director seems to have such a knack for.  I wasn’t always the biggest Gyllenhaal fan but he’s taken on some dynamite roles in the last few years (see End of Watch if Prisoners didn’t convince you) and I’m getting a friendly vibe from this first look at Enemy.

The Silver Bullet ~ Under the Skin

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Synopsis: An alien seductress preys upon hitchhikers in Scotland.

Release Date: April 14, 2014

Thoughts: Adapted from Michael Faber’s darkly comic novel from 2000, Under the Skin is a curious foreign product for star Scarlett Johansson (Her) finding her playing a beautiful alien who truly is a maneater.  I’ve seen a few previews of the film over the past year and they’ve all been decidedly artsy and obtuse.  I get the feeling that director Jonathan Glazer wants us to know that this isn’t your run of the mill horror film.  OK…we get it.  Now let’s see what ScarJo has up her alien sleeves…

The Silver Bullet ~ Oculus

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Synopsis: A woman tries to exonerate her brother, who was convicted of murder, by proving that the crime was committed by a supernatural phenomenon.

Release Date: April 11, 2014

Thoughts: First things first…I appreciate that this is truly a teaser trailer.  We all know how much I’m in favor of the less is more approach and while a longer version of this may be released before the film comes out in April, I have to say that this first look at another low-budget horror film from wunderkind producer Jason Blum (Paranormal Activity 4, Insidious, Insidious: Chapter 2, The Purge, Lawless, Sinister, Lords of Salem) gets the job done.  That being said, these movies tend to open big (usually without advance screenings) and then sink like a stone once word of mouth makes its way around.  One can only hope that Oculus will wind up being more ambitious than the rest and strike gold not only in the box office but with critics desperate for a good scare.

The Silver Bullet ~ Kite (2014)

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Synopsis: When her cop father is killed, a young woman tracks the murder with the apparent help of his ex-partner.

Release Date:  TBA 2014

Thoughts: Adapted from the popular 1998 Japanese anime, the US version of Kite has been through some less than breezy days in its way to the big screen.  Originally planned for 2008, the film lost some air when production details couldn’t be locked down.  Then when there was a green light to move forward the original director (David R. Ellis) sadly passed away during filming in South Africa.  With a replacement director wrapping things up Kite will get a chance to soar sometime in 2014 but fans are doubtful the overall impact of the original (which was heavy with the kind of sex and violence that would be next to impossible to secure in live-action format) can be matched no matter how flashy and amped up this first preview looks like the remake will be.  I’m thinking this could be a nice little bit of high adrenaline distraction with the always interesting presence of Samuel L. Jackson (Oldboy, Django Unchained) keeping things grounded. 

The Silver Bullet ~ Tyler Perry’s The Single Mom’s Club

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Synopsis: Brought together by a vandalism incident at their children’s school, a group of single mothers from different walks of life bond, and create a support group that helps them find comedy in the obstacles of life.

Release Date: March 14, 2014

Thoughts: Make no doubt about it, mogul Tyler Perry is one smart businessman.  Writing, producing, directing, and sometimes regrettably starring in his own films, Perry (Alex Cross, Star Trek) can make films for pennies that rake in millions.  Though his films aren’t as boffo profitable as they once were, each turn a profit so as long as tickets are sold his movies will continue to be churned out.  I just wish the films were as good as the casts he manages to assemble.  In his latest picture he’s gathered what could be called a “B” cast of familiar character actors from television in a story that looks like it could be called The First Wives Club are Waiting to Exhale.  These films aren’t my bag but I will admit to being interested in seeing what dramatic chops comedian Wendi McLendon-Covey has in her bag of tricks.